Shit according to the religions ;-)
Taoism - Shit happens, so flow with it.
Confucianism - Confucius says, "Shit happens."
Buddhism - If shit happens, it isn't really shit.
Zen - What is the sound of shit happening?
Hinduism - This shit happened before.
Islam - If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
Protestantism - Let shit happen to someone else.
Catholicism - If shit happens, you deserve it.
Baptist - We'll wash the shit right off you.
Judaism - Why does shit always happen to us.
Agnosticism - What is this shit?
Atheism - I don't believe this shit.
Rastafarianism - Hey, this is good shit, mon.
Christian Science - If shit happens it will clean itself up.
Mormonism - Our shit is cleaner than your shit.
Hare Krishna - Shit happens, Ramma Ramma!
Jehovah's Witnesses - Let me in your house so I can tell you why shit happens.
7th Day Adventism - Shit happens on Saturdays.
Episcopalianism - If shit happens, hold a procession.
Lutheranism - Shit happens, but as long as you're sorry, it's OK.
Anglicanism - It's true, shit does happen - but only to Lutherans.
Charismatic Catholicism - Shit is happening because you deserve it, but we love you anyway.
Orthodox - St. Sergius found his faith in deep shit.
Voodoo - Shit doesn't just happen - somebody dumped it on you.
Fundamentalism - There's no shit in the Bible.
Native Americans - Shit is sacred when it happens.
Shintoism - You inherit the shit from your ancestors.
Shamanism - Whoaa...Holy Shit!
Sikhism - Leave our shit alone.
Marxism - The rich shit exploits the poor shit, but deep down all shit is alike.
Socialism - The same shit happens to everyone.
Capitalism - Shit happens, and it'll cost you!
Materialism - Whoever dies with the most shit wins.
Realism - I think I need to take a shit.
Repressionism - I'll hold this shit in forever.
Americanism - Who gives a shit?